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INTERVIEW II
(February 25, 2008; New Jersey) When
you were playing guitar, you said you like to give people something
different than what they would expect. In what way do you mean in
particular?
I like to give them something different, be
different than what they perceive me as. People may have thought coming
out to the show the other night that they going to get five niggas on
the mic talking about “Yo, yeahhh” after every two words. But then they
got singing, then they got some comical parts, some charisma basically…
enthusiasm, some shit like that. I say if you coming to see a show,
that’s exactly what the fuck I give you.
Do you make a lot of songs that don’t get released?
Yeah.
Unfortunately I do, and those reasons why they don’t get released is
beyond my power, but we find creative things to do with them. We shop
them, we give them to some [other] artist, things like that. We find
soundtracks to put them on. My creative process is just simple. I don’t
write nothing so it’s simple as my moods. Whatever I feel is what I’ma
talk about.
Do you think
everything you do in the booth is worthwhile, or do you have songs you
record off the top and you’re like, “That’s a piece of shit, erase it
now?”
I’ve done that before. I’m not going to seem like I’m
not human, so yes of course. I’ve listened to something and been like,
“That shit was wack, trash it.” But I could probably count how many
times I did that on my hand.
You talk a lot about feeling like you’re in a zone. How does that feel different from what you were doing before?
It
doesn’t. That’s the scary part. It don’t feel no different, I still
feel like there’s something I have to prove. I still feel like I’m not
being respected. I still feel like I don’t have the crown. I still feel
like there’s still something I have to do that hasn’t been done. I feel
like I haven’t said things that I’m supposed to say to make every
motherfucker say that that nigga’s that nigga. I get that shit from a
lot of people, but I don’t get the recognition from the people I should
be getting recognized from, and that’s my peers in this game.
So you don’t feel more free in the booth than you ever have before?
Uh-uh.
There’s still restraints. I don’t feel like I’m that nigga until I walk
in that booth and feel everybody outside of this booth know I’m that
nigga. I got something to prove every time I step in that motherfucker.
Every time.
On Tha Carter II,
it seemed like you broke out a bit with “Shooter” and a couple other
records, but now it seems like you’re doing completely different,
bananas shit now. Was there a moment where you were like, “I don’t have
to be the rapper that people think I need to be, I can just get in here
and do ‘Pussy Monster’?”
I’ve always said what I wanted.
I’ve always stood outside the loop, when I was in the group Hot Boys and
everyone cursed, I was the only rapper who didn’t curse. People said,
Who tattoos their face as a kid? When [everybody] left Cash Money, who
was the nigga that stood and acted like that shit was an imperial place
to be? Me. I always did what I wanted to do, not giving a fuck what
nobody says. ‘Cause I never had a brother or sister, so I never had
nobody criticize me for what I do.
Do you take pride in pushing the limit? Is it something you’re consciously doing?
Everything
just comes naturally. I don’t sit around and say, “You know what we
should do?” or “I should’ve,” or sit around for a whole year and think
of something… That’s not me. If I think of it, we need to execute it
right now or at least a day away from now or I’ma forget about it ’cause
so much shit be in my head. If I ever sat down and planned something
and really wanted to sit down and strategize anything, I’d fuck around
and take over the whole world. So rappin’ must be what I’m planned for.
What’s different about the Carter III?
The last album’s called the Carter II.
Besides that.
[laughs]
I’m fucking around. Of course maturity, the person is totally
different, financially different. I’ve been inside better pussy since
the Carter II. Better miles, I’ve kissed better bitches. My
daughter grown, I ain’t said she got older, notice I said she grown.
There’s a lot of things. I have to take on a lot of responsibilities, a
lot of things into consideration. Creatively I’ve grown. That’s a big
difference on there. I’m involved in a lot of production on there, I’m
mixing my own album this time, mastering my own album. That’s a new
challenge for a nigga. That’s going to be a major difference so I get to
tell you exactly how I’ma sound.
How
does it feel now being free from the Mannie Fresh relationship? You’ve
moved on for several years, how have you evolved in terms of that?
At
that time I probably walked in the studio with “Let’s make a hit
without Mannie,” but now I walk in the studio and I’m like, “Let’s make
music… great music.” And I do whatever it takes to make it. If that
takes me picking up a guitar and actually learning how to play it, then
that’s what it takes. If it takes me getting on these drum sets, then
that’s what it takes. If it takes me learning how to sing these notes,
then that’s what it takes. And that’s what I’ve been doing and that’s
what you get on this album. I am creatively a monster now. Musically—a
phenomenon. I’m unbelievable in the studio, it’s crazy. It’s
unbelievable to me and everybody around me. And it makes people around
me get better in whatever they do, even if they not rappers. Whoever
they are it just makes them want to get better because they around
greatness. I go in that motherfucker and get in. I love that place, the
studio, so nobody can take it from me.
How does it feel?
Like
pussy. Good pussy, too. Nah, it feels like, you know how you go into a
classroom and say it’s exam day, and you know you didn’t study
everything for that test, and the test get in front of you and you see
it and you like, “Damn, I know every answer.” You know that feeling? You
don’t even worry. Forget the grade. That’s how I feel when I get in the
studio. Like, “Damn, I know all the answers.”
Do you birdman think you’d be as happy not making music?
Nowhere
near. I love my music. Next to my mom and my daughter, ain’t shit else,
and God of course, after that, nothing else. Music is first and last.
Outside of the economic benefits of being an artist, what motivates you?
Can
you get better? That’s what motivates me. People like Jay-Z, people
like Prince, to see someone that great and to know I’m nowhere near that
yet and I know how far I gotta go to get there and to know how much
people respect me now for whatever little shit I’ve done, or a lot of
shit I’ve done or however you look at it, it’s great to know that I
still got a whole lot to do. I can only imagine how beautiful that’s
gonna be.
Do you see yourself being 65 and making music, B.B. King style?
Nope.
I always said I don’t want to be doing shit after 35, 30. I always said
31, 32 I want to be some type of big exec. It ain’t good to be making
music that old. What the fuck am I gon’ talk about? I look at it like
Jay said: “What more can I say?” That’s why I work so hard, because I
want my future to be beautiful. From 35 to 40 I want to tour the world. I
don’t want to have no job, I want to be an exec, I want my money to be
making money for itself. I just want to take me and my woman and my kids
and go every-fucking-where. I’ma do it and I’ma have an artist pain’t
in one of my walls in my crib a map, a globe of the world and I’ma stand
on it. Matter fact, I’ma stand away from it and I’ma throw a dart and
my kids are gonna throw a dart. And wherever that dart lands, fuck it,
that’s where we gon’ go. I could do it now, I just want to do it then. I
just don’t have a map.
So you don’t look at 8 Ball and MJG and Scarface…
Different
time, can’t compare that. Different era, different money, different
people, different ways, different bitches, different clothes, different
year, different President, different everything. They whole career was
real rap, they whole career don’t amount to Carter II. I don’t
want niggas to be like, damn, some new rapper by the time I’m
30-something be doing something so amazing that his one line is colder
than everything, it sums up my whole career. I don’t want that. I don’t
know if I’ma be able to still do this. But thank God the style I have
right now is so good I can’t imagine myself doing this shit 10 years
from now. I’m already out this mug.
What do you think is your advantage over everybody else?
My
ethic. You work like I work then it’s gon’ be hard for motherfuckers to
say anything. I don’t care if the shit you was doing was wack. Remember
Master P put out like a zillion albums? I’d be the first to say all of
that shit was WACK, but he did it. And we know Master P for that. We
don’t know not one of them groups he put out and he put out 30 albums,
and we don’t know not one of them if it ain’t true. I don’t know ’em,
and I’m from New Orleans.
How much do you think being raised in the game has given you an advantage?
Oh
my gosh, that’s so perfect for me ’cause I know everything. You might
get me in a fucking grocery store and see how dumb I am to the real
world, but you in this music shit, ain’t nothing you could tell me. I
walk this bitch with my eyes closed. I know this shit. I’ve been in this
shit since I was 11. I wrote my first rap when I was eight. Got signed
when I was 12 and had my first album when I was 12 with B.G. I’m 25 now.
I feel like even then on top of that you also weren’t Bow Wow.
Nahhh,
not at all. I was from the streets for real. My momma wasn’t gon’ let
me get on there talking about no “A,B,C 1,2,3, my girlfriend love me, I
love you.” [My mother was like] “Tell them bitches boy, how we do.” My
momma a G.
What have you learned from watching Cash Money evolve?
Loyalty.
I learned that loyalty is the closest thing to magic. Meaning you don’t
know too many people with magic, you don’t know too many loyal people
either. A lot of niggas like to say they loyal. They making people think
they loyal, but they only loyal to themselves when they doing that. But
I ain’t gon’ out you for it, because I know loyalty is like magic and
I’m not expecting you to know magic. I’m just expecting a good album out
of you. So that’s how I look at that. Friendship—all that type of shit.
As you grow older you start to realize that all that shit is dead, it’s
like magic. There’s no such thing.
There’s friendship.
Nah,
there’s no such thing as friendship when you get to a certain age.
Unless you know a nigga with magic, then you might know a real friend.
Do you feel like you’re alone?
Nah. I have a nine-year-old. I could never be alone.
Family being much different than friendship.
Yeah, family ain’t on the same level. Friendship is magic and family is obvious.
Do you distrust people?
I
put myself in a mental position where I don’t have to. I don’t have to
trust you or distrust you. I don’t give a fuck about you. I don’t give a
fuck what you do. You could never harm me and take what I got going on.
You could never take this down. I’m too good. You gotta kill me, and I
worked too hard already so even if you kill me I won’t die. So, tough.
You got no magic.
You talk a lot about not giving a shit about what other people are think.
Mmm-hmm.
You ever read the definition of “insane”? It’s a person that cares a
lot about what people think about them. Caring about another person’s
thoughts of your actions. When you think about it, it’s insane. How the
fuck I’m gon’ worry about it? I wake up every morning by my fucking
self.
And yet, in your show you say to fans, “Without you guys I ain’t shit.”
At
all. And that’s real. Without ’em I ain’t shit. I don’t care about what
nobody think. That’s just me and I think that’s what they love about
me. If you gon’ come to my concert, I care about that. I care about you
being here, for me. And I acknowledge that and I let you know I ain’t
shit. This ain’t even a show without y’all being here. Same shit get
said every night when I step onstage. Same shit I say when I get on my
knees to pray. That’s how it be.
Where would you be without the fans?
In
New Orleans, on the corner some-fucking-where. Nah, I’m smart as shit.
I’d probably be in school somewhere doing something tryin’ be a lawyer
to something. I always wanted to be a lawyer.
What do you like about law?
Um,
I like that it controls the world. I like to get into something that
controls the world. I guess either that [or] a teacher or a doctor. I
can’t be a doctor ‘cause I’m not healthy. Meaning I smoke and drink, so,
I can’t be no doctor. A teacher, I feel like I’m already accomplishing
that by what I do.
What are you teaching?
How
I live. I feel that that’s enough. I ain’t saying I’m set out to teach
spelling and science, history. I’m teaching about me. And about the
lifestyle of people like me.
What’s the lesson to take away from that?
I can’t give it to ya. I just need to teach. I just gotta do shows.
Do you ever think you need to stop doing drugs?
Well,
yeah. I will. I will. Shit gon’ get played out. I know myself. But the
shit ain’t easy man, that shit be fucking up my stomach.
That’s what I hear.
Yeah,
man, the shit ain’t right. That shit like dope. I know you ain’t
probably never feel dope. But when you on dope, that shit is stupid.
That shit is, whooooo. You will literally feel it going nigga.
Like the Pepto Bismol commercial, when the pink shit go down across the
red part. You can feel this shit really doing that.
Did it freak you out?
Yeah,
it pissed me off just ’cause I couldn’t get off of it. That pissed me
the fuck off. ’Cause I can take pain good. I kinda think you need pain
every once in a while. But that wasn’t the pain I could take. Sorry, I
ain’t that strong. I even shot myself, that shit ain’t feel nowhere near
that. I was like, Lord. [starts breathing heavy] Breathe, nigga. I’m ’bout to go do yoga classes, nigga. The standing dog. [laughs] You know what I mean.
So it’s got to be hard imagining actually kicking it then.
Yeah,
I will. My doctor, a long time ago, he gave me these pills. I lost
them, but it was these pills and he told me this is what you take to get
off them. I’ma see. I never tried ’em. So if them bitches work, then I
probably gotta start. Other than that, it’s gon’ be hard. What a nigga
told me to do is start lessening my amount. So what I do, I tell niggas
to pour it for me, instead of me pouring it. ’Cause if I pour it, I just
be like, well yeah.
How much do you think you take?
Who
knows? I don’t even know. But now that I tell them to pour it, I be
patient. I be having to put Jolly Ranchers in the thing. ’Cause they
don’t put shit in there. I be thinking niggas is just fucking with my
head to tell you the truth. But nah, I’ma be aight. I’ma get off that
shit ‘cause I got sleep apnea. You know that shit Pimp C had? I got
that. My doctor been told me I had that when you stop breathing when you
sleep for ’bout 10 seconds. My whole [crew] stay getting scared. But I
got that shit. But you know, maybe I’ll slow down.
What do you like about getting fucked up?
I
don’t get fucked up. If I got fucked up, then I’d be messed up. This
what my nigga Mac told me one time—he said, “That nigga, he so high all
day that when he sober, that’s his high ’cause he’s never sober.” So if a
nigga sober, he high as a motherfucker. He ain’t used to being sober.
That’s how a nigga feel.
You’re definitely one of the most lucid dudes I’ve met smoking this much trees.
I am unusual. I do have a lot thoughts when I get up there. Like, do I have superpowers? [laughs] I wish I knew.
Last
time we talked, you talked about getting to the place that you thought
2Pac got to when he was here. How far away do you think you are from
that?
I think you have to ask the world that question. I
think I could never answer that. ’Cause how could I ever put myself
anywhere? That’s y’all’s job. But I told you man, I know it’s gon’ come
because that’s where I aim. And that’s greatness when you get like that.
Shit, I may change history. I may be the one great nigga that don’t go
when it’s time. I wanna be a Bob Marley. I wanna be a 2Pac. Their lives
mean so much after they gone. I wanna be like a Biggie. I wanna mean so
much after I’m gone. I want a motherfucker to rap like me. How I was
like, “I wanna be the next Jay,” I want motherfuckers to be like, “I
wanna be the next Wayne.” I want that shit. But I can never say if I’m
gon’ get there, when I’m there, if I’m ever there. That’s y’all.
What would you like for yourself to mean to everybody else, whether you’re gone or here?
Just
great. That worries me so much, ’cause that’s what I set out to be. I
try to be great in everything I do. Great father, great fucker, great
lover, great fighter, great kisser, great laugher, great singer, great
guitarist, great producer.
Do you still want to be the next Jay?
I
wouldn’t mind. You know what, I been thinking, I’d probably rather be
the next 50, this nigga is richer than shit ain’t he! I wanna be you,
Curtis! Nah, I’m just fucking around, I’d love to be either one of them
niggas. I’m respectful, I ain’t one of those niggas who be like “I’m
gonna be the next me!” No, nigga, them niggas is somebodies. I would
love to be the next Jay or the next 50.
What’s different about them?
I
will tell you exactly. I was told this in the Lamborghini store. I told
the nigga, “Give me something powerful.” He said a Ferrari shows, “Hey,
that’s a rich guy.” A Lamborghini says, “Hey, that’s a wealthy guy.”
And I’m like, “What’s the difference?” Rich guy, he got that Ferrari
this week and don’t have that bitch next month. Wealthy guy, he got that
Lamborghini, and he got a house he’s pulling up next to that
muthafucker, and probably two more of them, a family car… the difference
between me and them is: I’m rich, they’re wealthy.
So it’s a money thing?
Wealthy
mean you straight, you settled in every situation, you good. That mean
you so rich, everybody’s mind is at ease. Rich nigga want you to know
they got. I know I want you to know, I show it all the time. There’s a
difference, man, between rich and wealthy.
But it is an economic thing opposed to how they move, how they rap?
Yeah,
of course. I take from their styles though, a lot, because they’re
great! And not just them, shit, everybody. You put a dab of this and a
dab of that, and you say it your way. You put what you thought about it,
how you’d think about it. I don’t really take a nigga’s style, what I
do is I think what they rapped about, and think about how I would’ve
said it, what I would’ve said in that situation. I think about what
they’re actually rapping about instead of how they saying it and how
they flow with it.
How much time do you spend thinking about rap and music during the day?
I
don’t think it ’til I’m doing it. People probably think I be all day
rapping, but I ain’t gonna lie. I don’t think about it until we talking
about it. Other than that, we are so sports-ed out. We are little
newscasters in this motherfucker.
What do you want everyone to take away from the album?
Great! Great classic. Listen to that bitch everyday, every year. One of them albums.
That doesn’t seem to happen much anymore.
[If
it doesn’t happen] Then I’ll try again. Go chill, go on a little break,
relax, think about what I’m gonna think about, then come back and eat
your ass up again, if I didn’t do it the first time.
(February 25, 2008; New Jersey) When
you were playing guitar, you said you like to give people something
different than what they would expect. In what way do you mean in
particular?
I like to give them something different, be
different than what they perceive me as. People may have thought coming
out to the show the other night that they going to get five niggas on
the mic talking about “Yo, yeahhh” after every two words. But then they
got singing, then they got some comical parts, some charisma basically…
enthusiasm, some shit like that. I say if you coming to see a show,
that’s exactly what the fuck I give you.
Do you make a lot of songs that don’t get released?
Yeah.
Unfortunately I do, and those reasons why they don’t get released is
beyond my power, but we find creative things to do with them. We shop
them, we give them to some [other] artist, things like that. We find
soundtracks to put them on. My creative process is just simple. I don’t
write nothing so it’s simple as my moods. Whatever I feel is what I’ma
talk about.
Do you think
everything you do in the booth is worthwhile, or do you have songs you
record off the top and you’re like, “That’s a piece of shit, erase it
now?”
I’ve done that before. I’m not going to seem like I’m
not human, so yes of course. I’ve listened to something and been like,
“That shit was wack, trash it.” But I could probably count how many
times I did that on my hand.
You talk a lot about feeling like you’re in a zone. How does that feel different from what you were doing before?
It
doesn’t. That’s the scary part. It don’t feel no different, I still
feel like there’s something I have to prove. I still feel like I’m not
being respected. I still feel like I don’t have the crown. I still feel
like there’s still something I have to do that hasn’t been done. I feel
like I haven’t said things that I’m supposed to say to make every
motherfucker say that that nigga’s that nigga. I get that shit from a
lot of people, but I don’t get the recognition from the people I should
be getting recognized from, and that’s my peers in this game.
So you don’t feel more free in the booth than you ever have before?
Uh-uh.
There’s still restraints. I don’t feel like I’m that nigga until I walk
in that booth and feel everybody outside of this booth know I’m that
nigga. I got something to prove every time I step in that motherfucker.
Every time.
On Tha Carter II,
it seemed like you broke out a bit with “Shooter” and a couple other
records, but now it seems like you’re doing completely different,
bananas shit now. Was there a moment where you were like, “I don’t have
to be the rapper that people think I need to be, I can just get in here
and do ‘Pussy Monster’?”
I’ve always said what I wanted.
I’ve always stood outside the loop, when I was in the group Hot Boys and
everyone cursed, I was the only rapper who didn’t curse. People said,
Who tattoos their face as a kid? When [everybody] left Cash Money, who
was the nigga that stood and acted like that shit was an imperial place
to be? Me. I always did what I wanted to do, not giving a fuck what
nobody says. ‘Cause I never had a brother or sister, so I never had
nobody criticize me for what I do.
Do you take pride in pushing the limit? Is it something you’re consciously doing?
Everything
just comes naturally. I don’t sit around and say, “You know what we
should do?” or “I should’ve,” or sit around for a whole year and think
of something… That’s not me. If I think of it, we need to execute it
right now or at least a day away from now or I’ma forget about it ’cause
so much shit be in my head. If I ever sat down and planned something
and really wanted to sit down and strategize anything, I’d fuck around
and take over the whole world. So rappin’ must be what I’m planned for.
What’s different about the Carter III?
The last album’s called the Carter II.
Besides that.
[laughs]
I’m fucking around. Of course maturity, the person is totally
different, financially different. I’ve been inside better pussy since
the Carter II. Better miles, I’ve kissed better bitches. My
daughter grown, I ain’t said she got older, notice I said she grown.
There’s a lot of things. I have to take on a lot of responsibilities, a
lot of things into consideration. Creatively I’ve grown. That’s a big
difference on there. I’m involved in a lot of production on there, I’m
mixing my own album this time, mastering my own album. That’s a new
challenge for a nigga. That’s going to be a major difference so I get to
tell you exactly how I’ma sound.
How
does it feel now being free from the Mannie Fresh relationship? You’ve
moved on for several years, how have you evolved in terms of that?
At
that time I probably walked in the studio with “Let’s make a hit
without Mannie,” but now I walk in the studio and I’m like, “Let’s make
music… great music.” And I do whatever it takes to make it. If that
takes me picking up a guitar and actually learning how to play it, then
that’s what it takes. If it takes me getting on these drum sets, then
that’s what it takes. If it takes me learning how to sing these notes,
then that’s what it takes. And that’s what I’ve been doing and that’s
what you get on this album. I am creatively a monster now. Musically—a
phenomenon. I’m unbelievable in the studio, it’s crazy. It’s
unbelievable to me and everybody around me. And it makes people around
me get better in whatever they do, even if they not rappers. Whoever
they are it just makes them want to get better because they around
greatness. I go in that motherfucker and get in. I love that place, the
studio, so nobody can take it from me.
How does it feel?
Like
pussy. Good pussy, too. Nah, it feels like, you know how you go into a
classroom and say it’s exam day, and you know you didn’t study
everything for that test, and the test get in front of you and you see
it and you like, “Damn, I know every answer.” You know that feeling? You
don’t even worry. Forget the grade. That’s how I feel when I get in the
studio. Like, “Damn, I know all the answers.”
Do you birdman think you’d be as happy not making music?
Nowhere
near. I love my music. Next to my mom and my daughter, ain’t shit else,
and God of course, after that, nothing else. Music is first and last.
Outside of the economic benefits of being an artist, what motivates you?
Can
you get better? That’s what motivates me. People like Jay-Z, people
like Prince, to see someone that great and to know I’m nowhere near that
yet and I know how far I gotta go to get there and to know how much
people respect me now for whatever little shit I’ve done, or a lot of
shit I’ve done or however you look at it, it’s great to know that I
still got a whole lot to do. I can only imagine how beautiful that’s
gonna be.
Do you see yourself being 65 and making music, B.B. King style?
Nope.
I always said I don’t want to be doing shit after 35, 30. I always said
31, 32 I want to be some type of big exec. It ain’t good to be making
music that old. What the fuck am I gon’ talk about? I look at it like
Jay said: “What more can I say?” That’s why I work so hard, because I
want my future to be beautiful. From 35 to 40 I want to tour the world. I
don’t want to have no job, I want to be an exec, I want my money to be
making money for itself. I just want to take me and my woman and my kids
and go every-fucking-where. I’ma do it and I’ma have an artist pain’t
in one of my walls in my crib a map, a globe of the world and I’ma stand
on it. Matter fact, I’ma stand away from it and I’ma throw a dart and
my kids are gonna throw a dart. And wherever that dart lands, fuck it,
that’s where we gon’ go. I could do it now, I just want to do it then. I
just don’t have a map.
So you don’t look at 8 Ball and MJG and Scarface…
Different
time, can’t compare that. Different era, different money, different
people, different ways, different bitches, different clothes, different
year, different President, different everything. They whole career was
real rap, they whole career don’t amount to Carter II. I don’t
want niggas to be like, damn, some new rapper by the time I’m
30-something be doing something so amazing that his one line is colder
than everything, it sums up my whole career. I don’t want that. I don’t
know if I’ma be able to still do this. But thank God the style I have
right now is so good I can’t imagine myself doing this shit 10 years
from now. I’m already out this mug.
What do you think is your advantage over everybody else?
My
ethic. You work like I work then it’s gon’ be hard for motherfuckers to
say anything. I don’t care if the shit you was doing was wack. Remember
Master P put out like a zillion albums? I’d be the first to say all of
that shit was WACK, but he did it. And we know Master P for that. We
don’t know not one of them groups he put out and he put out 30 albums,
and we don’t know not one of them if it ain’t true. I don’t know ’em,
and I’m from New Orleans.
How much do you think being raised in the game has given you an advantage?
Oh
my gosh, that’s so perfect for me ’cause I know everything. You might
get me in a fucking grocery store and see how dumb I am to the real
world, but you in this music shit, ain’t nothing you could tell me. I
walk this bitch with my eyes closed. I know this shit. I’ve been in this
shit since I was 11. I wrote my first rap when I was eight. Got signed
when I was 12 and had my first album when I was 12 with B.G. I’m 25 now.
I feel like even then on top of that you also weren’t Bow Wow.
Nahhh,
not at all. I was from the streets for real. My momma wasn’t gon’ let
me get on there talking about no “A,B,C 1,2,3, my girlfriend love me, I
love you.” [My mother was like] “Tell them bitches boy, how we do.” My
momma a G.
What have you learned from watching Cash Money evolve?
Loyalty.
I learned that loyalty is the closest thing to magic. Meaning you don’t
know too many people with magic, you don’t know too many loyal people
either. A lot of niggas like to say they loyal. They making people think
they loyal, but they only loyal to themselves when they doing that. But
I ain’t gon’ out you for it, because I know loyalty is like magic and
I’m not expecting you to know magic. I’m just expecting a good album out
of you. So that’s how I look at that. Friendship—all that type of shit.
As you grow older you start to realize that all that shit is dead, it’s
like magic. There’s no such thing.
There’s friendship.
Nah,
there’s no such thing as friendship when you get to a certain age.
Unless you know a nigga with magic, then you might know a real friend.
Do you feel like you’re alone?
Nah. I have a nine-year-old. I could never be alone.
Family being much different than friendship.
Yeah, family ain’t on the same level. Friendship is magic and family is obvious.
Do you distrust people?
I
put myself in a mental position where I don’t have to. I don’t have to
trust you or distrust you. I don’t give a fuck about you. I don’t give a
fuck what you do. You could never harm me and take what I got going on.
You could never take this down. I’m too good. You gotta kill me, and I
worked too hard already so even if you kill me I won’t die. So, tough.
You got no magic.
You talk a lot about not giving a shit about what other people are think.
Mmm-hmm.
You ever read the definition of “insane”? It’s a person that cares a
lot about what people think about them. Caring about another person’s
thoughts of your actions. When you think about it, it’s insane. How the
fuck I’m gon’ worry about it? I wake up every morning by my fucking
self.
And yet, in your show you say to fans, “Without you guys I ain’t shit.”
At
all. And that’s real. Without ’em I ain’t shit. I don’t care about what
nobody think. That’s just me and I think that’s what they love about
me. If you gon’ come to my concert, I care about that. I care about you
being here, for me. And I acknowledge that and I let you know I ain’t
shit. This ain’t even a show without y’all being here. Same shit get
said every night when I step onstage. Same shit I say when I get on my
knees to pray. That’s how it be.
Where would you be without the fans?
In
New Orleans, on the corner some-fucking-where. Nah, I’m smart as shit.
I’d probably be in school somewhere doing something tryin’ be a lawyer
to something. I always wanted to be a lawyer.
What do you like about law?
Um,
I like that it controls the world. I like to get into something that
controls the world. I guess either that [or] a teacher or a doctor. I
can’t be a doctor ‘cause I’m not healthy. Meaning I smoke and drink, so,
I can’t be no doctor. A teacher, I feel like I’m already accomplishing
that by what I do.
What are you teaching?
How
I live. I feel that that’s enough. I ain’t saying I’m set out to teach
spelling and science, history. I’m teaching about me. And about the
lifestyle of people like me.
What’s the lesson to take away from that?
I can’t give it to ya. I just need to teach. I just gotta do shows.
Do you ever think you need to stop doing drugs?
Well,
yeah. I will. I will. Shit gon’ get played out. I know myself. But the
shit ain’t easy man, that shit be fucking up my stomach.
That’s what I hear.
Yeah,
man, the shit ain’t right. That shit like dope. I know you ain’t
probably never feel dope. But when you on dope, that shit is stupid.
That shit is, whooooo. You will literally feel it going nigga.
Like the Pepto Bismol commercial, when the pink shit go down across the
red part. You can feel this shit really doing that.
Did it freak you out?
Yeah,
it pissed me off just ’cause I couldn’t get off of it. That pissed me
the fuck off. ’Cause I can take pain good. I kinda think you need pain
every once in a while. But that wasn’t the pain I could take. Sorry, I
ain’t that strong. I even shot myself, that shit ain’t feel nowhere near
that. I was like, Lord. [starts breathing heavy] Breathe, nigga. I’m ’bout to go do yoga classes, nigga. The standing dog. [laughs] You know what I mean.
So it’s got to be hard imagining actually kicking it then.
Yeah,
I will. My doctor, a long time ago, he gave me these pills. I lost
them, but it was these pills and he told me this is what you take to get
off them. I’ma see. I never tried ’em. So if them bitches work, then I
probably gotta start. Other than that, it’s gon’ be hard. What a nigga
told me to do is start lessening my amount. So what I do, I tell niggas
to pour it for me, instead of me pouring it. ’Cause if I pour it, I just
be like, well yeah.
How much do you think you take?
Who
knows? I don’t even know. But now that I tell them to pour it, I be
patient. I be having to put Jolly Ranchers in the thing. ’Cause they
don’t put shit in there. I be thinking niggas is just fucking with my
head to tell you the truth. But nah, I’ma be aight. I’ma get off that
shit ‘cause I got sleep apnea. You know that shit Pimp C had? I got
that. My doctor been told me I had that when you stop breathing when you
sleep for ’bout 10 seconds. My whole [crew] stay getting scared. But I
got that shit. But you know, maybe I’ll slow down.
What do you like about getting fucked up?
I
don’t get fucked up. If I got fucked up, then I’d be messed up. This
what my nigga Mac told me one time—he said, “That nigga, he so high all
day that when he sober, that’s his high ’cause he’s never sober.” So if a
nigga sober, he high as a motherfucker. He ain’t used to being sober.
That’s how a nigga feel.
You’re definitely one of the most lucid dudes I’ve met smoking this much trees.
I am unusual. I do have a lot thoughts when I get up there. Like, do I have superpowers? [laughs] I wish I knew.
Last
time we talked, you talked about getting to the place that you thought
2Pac got to when he was here. How far away do you think you are from
that?
I think you have to ask the world that question. I
think I could never answer that. ’Cause how could I ever put myself
anywhere? That’s y’all’s job. But I told you man, I know it’s gon’ come
because that’s where I aim. And that’s greatness when you get like that.
Shit, I may change history. I may be the one great nigga that don’t go
when it’s time. I wanna be a Bob Marley. I wanna be a 2Pac. Their lives
mean so much after they gone. I wanna be like a Biggie. I wanna mean so
much after I’m gone. I want a motherfucker to rap like me. How I was
like, “I wanna be the next Jay,” I want motherfuckers to be like, “I
wanna be the next Wayne.” I want that shit. But I can never say if I’m
gon’ get there, when I’m there, if I’m ever there. That’s y’all.
What would you like for yourself to mean to everybody else, whether you’re gone or here?
Just
great. That worries me so much, ’cause that’s what I set out to be. I
try to be great in everything I do. Great father, great fucker, great
lover, great fighter, great kisser, great laugher, great singer, great
guitarist, great producer.
Do you still want to be the next Jay?
I
wouldn’t mind. You know what, I been thinking, I’d probably rather be
the next 50, this nigga is richer than shit ain’t he! I wanna be you,
Curtis! Nah, I’m just fucking around, I’d love to be either one of them
niggas. I’m respectful, I ain’t one of those niggas who be like “I’m
gonna be the next me!” No, nigga, them niggas is somebodies. I would
love to be the next Jay or the next 50.
What’s different about them?
I
will tell you exactly. I was told this in the Lamborghini store. I told
the nigga, “Give me something powerful.” He said a Ferrari shows, “Hey,
that’s a rich guy.” A Lamborghini says, “Hey, that’s a wealthy guy.”
And I’m like, “What’s the difference?” Rich guy, he got that Ferrari
this week and don’t have that bitch next month. Wealthy guy, he got that
Lamborghini, and he got a house he’s pulling up next to that
muthafucker, and probably two more of them, a family car… the difference
between me and them is: I’m rich, they’re wealthy.
So it’s a money thing?
Wealthy
mean you straight, you settled in every situation, you good. That mean
you so rich, everybody’s mind is at ease. Rich nigga want you to know
they got. I know I want you to know, I show it all the time. There’s a
difference, man, between rich and wealthy.
But it is an economic thing opposed to how they move, how they rap?
Yeah,
of course. I take from their styles though, a lot, because they’re
great! And not just them, shit, everybody. You put a dab of this and a
dab of that, and you say it your way. You put what you thought about it,
how you’d think about it. I don’t really take a nigga’s style, what I
do is I think what they rapped about, and think about how I would’ve
said it, what I would’ve said in that situation. I think about what
they’re actually rapping about instead of how they saying it and how
they flow with it.
How much time do you spend thinking about rap and music during the day?
I
don’t think it ’til I’m doing it. People probably think I be all day
rapping, but I ain’t gonna lie. I don’t think about it until we talking
about it. Other than that, we are so sports-ed out. We are little
newscasters in this motherfucker.
What do you want everyone to take away from the album?
Great! Great classic. Listen to that bitch everyday, every year. One of them albums.
That doesn’t seem to happen much anymore.
[If
it doesn’t happen] Then I’ll try again. Go chill, go on a little break,
relax, think about what I’m gonna think about, then come back and eat
your ass up again, if I didn’t do it the first time.
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