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Shut the FUCK UP and keep your BACK AGAINST the wall
Make best friends with yourself. every single interesting tidbit or fact you wanna add into the conversation, before you say anything, remember the very first rule i told you: SHUT THE FUCK UP.
the more you tell about yourself the less prisoners will trust you. basically dont speak unless spoken to and dont volunteer. whatever someone wants to know about you they already know
likewise if you DO pick a friend you better stick with him thru thick and thin
DONT TALK SHIT UNLESS YOUR BACK IS AGAINST THE WALL. I REPEAT.
dont cry unless its at night while your laying down. trust me, jail really isnt as sad as you think. you'll get out again. so dont be a little whiny bitch thats annoying other prisoners. just puts a bigger target on your back
dont volunteer for anything extra. you're here to do your time and nothing else. making friends with the cops to shorten your sentence is only gunna make your remaining ones longer
make a weapon somehow, someway. different jail different restrictions, but you can make contraband out of SOMETHING in there, and if you cant, play your cards right someone might help you
get good at basketball and rapping. it literally will make your time easier in the pin.
you're broke all the time, and you never have anything on your books. (even if u do) learn how to hide things in plain sight and fast. nothing is yours forever, so expect your shit to be confiscated (no matter how well hidden) every so often
your gunna have to prove yourself to SOMEBODY there, so just sit still. and wait on it
if you act too nice someone'll try to put a dick in ur mouth, so beware
honestly, also, if you have any gang affiliations, i dont care if its the KKK, guess what, those aryian are your brothers now. you leave who you started with.
get used to having to do a lil coke every now and then
easier drug to find in the pin.
when i have more tips i will give
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the bible will become your best friend. Not because you're gunna become a christian or anything, but because its litterally th most interesting thing you can do in jail. theres literally nothing else to do. unless you're in one of those special jails where they allow xbox 360's in that bitch and shit, your gunna learn an AWFUL lot about jesus, whether you're athiest or not
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if aint nobody helping you on yo court date (not sitting in, a witness or nothing,) then dont tell em SHIT. they ask you what you in for, you tell them how many days you in for, and then stop talking.
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if you scared of bugs you not gon make it. they aint got no roach spray, fly swatter or nothing, just cover all the holes in your cell and make a little caccoon when it comes close to nighttime, i had a pet roach name wilbert in there. he lasted a day but my cellmate killed him. i hid him in a little spot in the back so he was boxed in and could hear him breathing cuz i heard his wings. if my cell wouldnt have killed him, i probably couldve actually potty trained him and shit, probably couldve been a lil runner
- - - Updated - - -
basically ive had so many bugs run over me in my sleep i refuse to sleep with the lights off now. and i still feel like bugs are crawling on me til this day
Make best friends with yourself. every single interesting tidbit or fact you wanna add into the conversation, before you say anything, remember the very first rule i told you: SHUT THE FUCK UP.
the more you tell about yourself the less prisoners will trust you. basically dont speak unless spoken to and dont volunteer. whatever someone wants to know about you they already know
likewise if you DO pick a friend you better stick with him thru thick and thin
DONT TALK SHIT UNLESS YOUR BACK IS AGAINST THE WALL. I REPEAT.
dont cry unless its at night while your laying down. trust me, jail really isnt as sad as you think. you'll get out again. so dont be a little whiny bitch thats annoying other prisoners. just puts a bigger target on your back
dont volunteer for anything extra. you're here to do your time and nothing else. making friends with the cops to shorten your sentence is only gunna make your remaining ones longer
make a weapon somehow, someway. different jail different restrictions, but you can make contraband out of SOMETHING in there, and if you cant, play your cards right someone might help you
get good at basketball and rapping. it literally will make your time easier in the pin.
you're broke all the time, and you never have anything on your books. (even if u do) learn how to hide things in plain sight and fast. nothing is yours forever, so expect your shit to be confiscated (no matter how well hidden) every so often
your gunna have to prove yourself to SOMEBODY there, so just sit still. and wait on it
if you act too nice someone'll try to put a dick in ur mouth, so beware
honestly, also, if you have any gang affiliations, i dont care if its the KKK, guess what, those aryian are your brothers now. you leave who you started with.
get used to having to do a lil coke every now and then
easier drug to find in the pin.
when i have more tips i will give
- - - Updated - - -
the bible will become your best friend. Not because you're gunna become a christian or anything, but because its litterally th most interesting thing you can do in jail. theres literally nothing else to do. unless you're in one of those special jails where they allow xbox 360's in that bitch and shit, your gunna learn an AWFUL lot about jesus, whether you're athiest or not
- - - Updated - - -
if aint nobody helping you on yo court date (not sitting in, a witness or nothing,) then dont tell em SHIT. they ask you what you in for, you tell them how many days you in for, and then stop talking.
- - - Updated - - -
- - - Updated - - -
if you scared of bugs you not gon make it. they aint got no roach spray, fly swatter or nothing, just cover all the holes in your cell and make a little caccoon when it comes close to nighttime, i had a pet roach name wilbert in there. he lasted a day but my cellmate killed him. i hid him in a little spot in the back so he was boxed in and could hear him breathing cuz i heard his wings. if my cell wouldnt have killed him, i probably couldve actually potty trained him and shit, probably couldve been a lil runner
- - - Updated - - -
basically ive had so many bugs run over me in my sleep i refuse to sleep with the lights off now. and i still feel like bugs are crawling on me til this day
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