Young Corruption: True Story

[Young Corruption]

True Story.jpg
Cover to my freetape made by Olly (click to enlarge)

True Story started as just a song and nothing more but as time went on I decided to make it something bigger. I wrote this song back in October and recorded in January. This is just like the anthem to the freetape. Enjoy


I'm not including the cover to this song that was made by Olly on the forum but it is up on soundcloud if you wanna see it.

Suck
It

[lilchukieforeheadbig]

i usually would say how garbage you are, and i expected it to be garbage based on your previous work that i've heard.
i was actually anxious and ready to tear you apart and say how wack this is.
but i actually enjoyed this shit bro. you killed it. i can finally feel your emotion better.
still needs some minor improvements here and there. but i honestly think this is your best song,
and the best song on the first page right now.
you finally gettin where you need to be rapwise. i think imma download this.
hurry and drop more songs bro.

[Young Corruption]

i usually would say how garbage you are, and i expected it to be garbage based on your previous work that i've heard.
i was actually anxious and ready to tear you apart and say how wack this is.
but i actually enjoyed this shit bro. you killed it. i can finally feel your emotion better.
still needs some minor improvements here and there. but i honestly think this is your best song,
and the best song on the first page right now.
you finally gettin where you need to be rapwise. i think imma download this.
hurry and drop more songs bro.

Lol seeing your name on the thread I was ready to hear you say I'm garbage but this is a pleasant surprise. But thank you man, I have been improving on the emotion and especially on this project because its mostly true stories as you can probably tell from the cover and it means something to me haha. This was uploaded four months ago so I know the other songs will be better with emotion and i'm always trying to improve with any feedback good or bad which you usually give me. I'll drop maybe one or two more songs this week depending on this weekend

[Cli-City]

Volume could be turned up a bit. I was having trouble understanding some lines...

Flow Wise bro, you slipped up a couple times on this..If your delivery was a little better then that would actually add to your flow....
your voice is kinda weird..it's like you talk a little too proper and it distracts from the experience.......some of your bars are too long and you try to speed it up but it doesn really match...

Lyrically: this was average.....nothing really stood out to me.....you had some dope lines in there but it was very average

Delivery: This is where I was most disappointing...I feel like for the type of track it is...you were a little too passive......

Song is decent but you can do much better...and I have heard much better also.....Keep doing your thing though..

2/5

[lilchukieforeheadbig]

Volume could be turned up a bit. I was having trouble understanding some lines...

Flow Wise bro, you slipped up a couple times on this..If your delivery was a little better then that would actually add to your flow....
your voice is kinda weird..it's like you talk a little too proper and it distracts from the experience.......some of your bars are too long and you try to speed it up but it doesn really match...

Lyrically: this was average.....nothing really stood out to me.....you had some dope lines in there but it was very average

Delivery: This is where I was most disappointing...I feel like for the type of track it is...you were a little too passive......

Song is decent but you can do much better...and I have heard much better also.....Keep doing your thing though..

2/5

you gotta be kidding bro, its at least a 3.5/5 at worst, though i'd give it a 4/5.
definately not a 2/5.

\

[MC_Crary]

You didn't ride this beat at all in my opinion. It could have went so much further if you switched up the flow a bit with the beat. If there was a hook I didn't hear it. Honestly your flow is too boring to carry an entire track, so that wasn't a good idea. You definitely improved since I last heard you though. Just keeping working and you'll get there. Maybe it's time to start focusing on beefing up those lyrics. That may help in the flow department too. If there were any stand out lines, I missed them because of delivery and volume. The emotion isn't there at all. Sounded like you trying to talk to the "haters" on this, but you sounded like you were just talking to your mic. You've got treat the mic like it's your audience. Keep working man, and keep posting. The more feed and tips you get, the faster you'll grow.

[mykill]

I'm seriously diggin' the beat... Young Corrupt flow is still in effect (but not in a good way). Like the story telling aspects of the first verse. If nothing else you seem to have learned to stay on beat pretty well. You sound good, but it sounds like you suffer from the same problem I do - putting too many words in a line and trying to rush it to get it all out. You gotta watch the flow of each bar to the next. Work on that a bit and you'll be golden.

[Moosh&Twist]

The flow on this really turns me off of this song. I do however thoroughly enjoy the beat. Your transition from bar to bar is not very good or atleast it is not smooth. If your lyrics were spit with a flow that actually fit the beat it would be fire. I just hope you work on flowing with the beat to perfection to bring out the dopeness that I believe that you can get. Right now not feeling this though. 2.5/5

[Late122]

Yo the beat sounds gooood! The flow reminds me of Nobel's flow. The flow is good but I think you need little more delivery. Also boost vocals a bit and use a click & pop eliminator and try some filters to make those popping sounds out. I really like how the story goes and flow builds. Try to work on that delivery and boost the volume a bit. Gonna be waiting for this tape!

[YUNG DIEZEL]

dope bro, killed it. 5/5 keep it up.

[ATLien666]

You have really improved, but you're still latching onto some of the things that held you back before.

Flow - You stayed on beat through most of the song, but have you tried that text-to-speech thing on Windows? You still rap like that. Like MC said, your flow is too boring to carry a full song. So, I recommend trying different flows or something. If you rapped all monotone, you'll be lucky to have a person's attention throughout the whole song. Put a little more emotion in your delivery, too. You're on track to being really good, just keep it up and take some of the criticism into consideration. Also, like Mykill said, you suffer from the same problem we have: putting too many words in a line and trying to stretch it out. Sometimes, it's not noticeable, but there was a lot of times, it was really noticeable. 2.5/5

Lyrics - Your lyrics have definitely improved. I'll admit, I barely heard it all because of the low volume and lack of emotion, but I like the story telling vibe. A nigga got confused when you talked about killing somebody, lmao, but only because I didn't really hear everything that happened before. You should post the lyrics or something. Oh wait, I just noticed that the lyrics are on your soundcloud page. So, the lyrics were the strongest part of the song. Shit is depressing, but it's impressive. I liked how you told a whole story; from the beginning to the massacre to the suicide. Really nice. I'm curious to hear your whole mixtape. 3.8/5

Overall - 3/5

[Young Corruption]

Lyrics are on my actually soundcloud

Lyrics:
i was on the short bus but don't call me retarded
i'm smarter that half of you, just a little distorted
my thoughts, my actions, man you better believe me
kill me cause the words i spit are the key to society
but they want to hate, why? cause i dropped out of college
i had everything they wanted but they don't wanna acknowledge
the truth of my mind is nothing but a headache
everyone thinks they know me but wait till the daybreaks
my true colors will show then massacre is where it ends
but let me bring you back to the day where it begins
i started to feel angry when no one was around
and that carried on and i couldn't surmount
i acted happy when i wasn't, i'm pretending to the world
and i saw the fear in the eyes of this 12 year old girl
when i ran up to her dad, killed him for not respecting
but i guess thats what happens when the people are rejecting
I was never heaven-sent i'm living in devils ways
god wishes that i would pray but thats not the way i was raise
i'm the product of Corruption thats how i got my name
i locked Rene away cause he doesn't like what i'm saying
now your trying to get rid of me cause i'm out of control
i'll make your life a living hell to the thousand-fold
they say Young Corruption why do always sound so angryly
you don't know what the fuck i've been through so dangerously
and uhhh people try to judge without having the whole story
well here it is people, now judge with the true story
i'm not here to impress anyone but the demons inside
i wanna to get rid of them its harder to decide
whats the good from the bad its making my head hurt
i try to do good but its gets mixed up in my words
I'm tired of my life i'm gonna end it right now
this is my goodbye i'm gonna end it real loud

Song was recorded 5 months ago. I guess i'll try to speak more gangsta. I didn't know being proper was a bad thing, i was thinking it would make me a little more unique but i can do other ways. I do consider everything everyone tells me which is why i haven't drop anything recent. I've been really busy with real life so i don't record as much as i can but my newer songs will have more emotion and i'm learning to change up my flow. I always had problems finding out more than one way to rap on a song and i'm still figuring it out. But i do have 79 plays on the song so i am doing something right and that's that i don't play them to raise the count myself.