Break Free: Young Corruption

[Young Corruption]

Alright this is my first song that reached over 300 plays. Currently it has 332 play and over 200 just this week. Its been raising about 50 plays a day and has keep steady over the past two weeks

Breaking free through life is something i never expected
i went through real shit and it had its own expensives
living in the slumps wasn't where i wanted to be
so i had to make a change if i ever wanted to be freeand my story wasn't good where should i begin?
I guess a true story is where its gonna end
i broke up with my girlfriend, went to a depression
my home boy grabbed me and shook me in a new directionWeed is where i landed everything was going great
but i never knew thats how i'm gonna get raped
let me bring it back for you cause i just jumped the gun
there was a point in time when i knew i should of runbut something was holding me back and i didn't know what
looking back in time i still don't know what
i needed a way out so i did what i had to
and thats to move out and that didn't last tooVerse 2This is where chapter two in my life begins
i was going through rough times wondering when its gonna end
i knew what i was doing wasn't what i was suppose to
it started out inncent till i got into the coke groupsniffing lines was becoming the new thing to do
and i know that shit wasn't gonna make me look cool
but no one could understand what i was going through
so i said fuck it let me do what i needed tooand thats the begining of the end when i got locked up
you would think that would change me but i just got fucked up
I came out worse than what i had ever imagined
but now its time to change there needs to be actionYoung Corruption your killing me i hate you ass
I want my life back, i wanna relax
But yet i need you, I can't live without you
you made me who i am and so i gotta stay trueVerse 3It seems like forget why you ever created me?
i was there for you when you were ready to bleed
i was there for you when everyone left your side
if it was for me being there you would of diedBut yet you said you want to forget everything i've done?
if it wasn't for me you would of died because of a gun
I'm the one that protected you from ever being jumped
I took the hit while you were hiding being a cuntwhere was your god at when you were praying to him
he lefted your ass while your singing those hymns
So go ahead and call me the demon from inside
we all know thats a lie because i'm coming alivei'm gaining more control of your weak ass mind
its only a matter of time before i leave you behind
the life you once knew is coming to an end
I'm supreme being thats ready to descent

This song has part of True Story and its 100% true. The tape was suppose to be about all true events that happened to me but its wasn't up to par so i'll be releasing them one by one over the weeks, Enjoy

Feedback:
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EDIT: The soundcloud plugin doesn't seem to want to work so just click the link. Lyrics are on the website as well
MOD: Fixed

[mykill]

Did you get someone to do the hook or did it come with the beat?

You always sound so robotic with your flow. You can keep beat, but it sounds so disconnected from the song and unnatural. Definitely need to pitch that "demon" voice a bit lower to get the full effect. Maybe add some adlibs so that it sounds more haunting. When I first heard it, I thought you just recorded that part way later and your voice or delivery changed since the first verse.

Lyrics are relative to the topic and fit the concept. The whole demon concept has been done around here though... I would love to see you do something fresh with it though.

Overall: 3.2/5, Needs work, but I can see your improvements from previous music. Good job!

[ATLien666]

I see you still haven't fixed your main fault. The lyrics and the flow were on point, I am curious how the whole true stories thing would stretch out to a whole cd considering you basically told us everything here. Like Mykill said, this was a great time to try something different, approaching this storytelling from a different angle, like Kendrick and Swimming Pools. But drastic improvements from your old songs, just work on that delivery, especially on songs like these.

3/5

[YUNG DIEZEL]

you sound exactly like thp, except different content. more depressing stuff, instead of swag and weed rap lol.
you got your own lil style, and it works.

[Young Corruption]

Did you get someone to do the hook or did it come with the beat?

You always sound so robotic with your flow. You can keep beat, but it sounds so disconnected from the song and unnatural. Definitely need to pitch that "demon" voice a bit lower to get the full effect. Maybe add some adlibs so that it sounds more haunting. When I first heard it, I thought you just recorded that part way later and your voice or delivery changed since the first verse.

Lyrics are relative to the topic and fit the concept. The whole demon concept has been done around here though... I would love to see you do something fresh with it though.

Overall: 3.2/5, Needs work, but I can see your improvements from previous music. Good job!

The hook came with the beat. And i understand what you mean about the monotune vocals. I think i fixed that in the nest song i'll drop. I gotcha on the adilbs i'll try to work some in when i can. The third verse was recorded at a different time. It was only going to have two verses but have a week or so i decided i could get a third one in.

I see you still haven't fixed your main fault. The lyrics and the flow were on point, I am curious how the whole true stories thing would stretch out to a whole cd considering you basically told us everything here. Like Mykill said, this was a great time to try something different, approaching this storytelling from a different angle, like Kendrick and Swimming Pools. But drastic improvements from your old songs, just work on that delivery, especially on songs like these.

3/5

I really didn't tell everything. This song was more of an outline of my life, it was going to be the first song and then the following songs would be actual events... to an certain point of course, some things are better left unsaid. Thanks for the feedback and i'll try to work on them when i start a new song

you sound exactly like thp, except different content. more depressing stuff, instead of swag and weed rap lol.
you got your own lil style, and it works.

Thank you. I only started rapping because i didn't know how to talk to people in a emotional way and so i had all these things bottled up and rap was the easiest way to express myself. That's what i took up the style storytelling

[YUNG DIEZEL]

after listenin to dis beat, i think @Sentus would sound good on this beat, this usually the types he be on.
maybe he should do a verse on this,
or do the demon voice, becuz he has a more aggressive voice, and that compliments the demon persona better.

Thank you. I only started rapping because i didn't know how to talk to people in a emotional way and so i had all these things bottled up and rap was the easiest way to express myself. That's what i took up the style storytelling

interesting............
gotta be emotional in rap too, but then again, there are famous monotone type rappers.
dats why i didnt complain about that aspect in this song, becuz it kinda works for you imo...

[Young Corruption]

after listenin to dis beat, i think @Sentus would sound good on this beat, this usually the types he be on.
maybe he should do a verse on this,
or do the demon voice, becuz he has a more aggressive voice, and that compliments the demon persona better.



interesting............
gotta be emotional in rap too, but then again, there are famous monotone type rappers.
dats why i didnt complain about that aspect in this song, becuz it kinda works for you imo...

Well if he was down. I can re-record my verses to show more emotional because i think i've got it down from my last song. Then delete my 3rd verse and let him have it

[Sentus]

This beat is sweet

[Young Corruption]

This beat is sweet

I can give you the beat. Just let me know

[Cli-City]

Instantly got caught my the beat and sample..Dope shit....Your voice caught me off guard though..A little light for my taste. It really seems like you are just talking bro. No type of energy or flow. Lyrically it was average but good enough for a storytelling song. Very good attempt..Listen to Eminem and Scarface..those niggas are great at storytelling..study the inflection in their voices and how they deliver..They accomplish telling a story but still staying super lyrical...Chorus and Beat are dope though...should've thrown on a feature on this one...

[Young Corruption]

Instantly got caught my the beat and sample..Dope shit....Your voice caught me off guard though..A little light for my taste. It really seems like you are just talking bro. No type of energy or flow. Lyrically it was average but good enough for a storytelling song. Very good attempt..Listen to Eminem and Scarface..those niggas are great at storytelling..study the inflection in their voices and how they deliver..They accomplish telling a story but still staying super lyrical...Chorus and Beat are dope though...should've thrown on a feature on this one...

Like I said i'm willing to give out the beat to anyone if they want it or i can re-record the first two verses and leave the third verse free to let anyone scoop in a do a remix of it. The choice is up to anyone. Also i didn't have a feature because this song is about 4 to 5 months old along with the rest of the stuff i'm going to drop expect for a few exceptions. Since i wasn't in the studio to get to know anyones' style i felt i could do this on my own

[Sentus]

Like I said, the beat is amazing. Your delivery didn't have close to the amount of emotion you needed to. You sound like you had a completely normal life and that you don't mean anything your saying in the song. Flow fucked up a lot. There were many times you had too many syllables in the line and at the end would rush the last couple words to make it work. Get all the kinks in the flow out before you record it...Lyrically it was pretty bland. Work on your rhyming. All you rhymed were one syllable words. 3-4 syllable rhymes will make it sound better and will help the flow.