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Midnight Music- Yung Zimmie (Snippet)

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  • Midnight Music- Yung Zimmie (Snippet)


    basically scrapped this up not sure if its any good i have two more verses recorded for it but i want to see how you guys like it as it stands now (first ever recorded song)

    FEEDBACK:

    http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...sic-video.html
    http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...avid-slim.html
    http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...86-_-alex.html

    LYRICS:

    stuck in a state of stagnation
    im not patient can’t find my location
    on google maps these rappers dieing out
    no innovation dieing from realness deprivation
    locked in they minds voluntary incarceration
    they say imitation is the highest form of flattery
    these rappers empty shells like dead batteries
    Last edited by Zimmie; 06-15-2016, 09:32 AM.




    #FREEVELVET

  • #2
    We can hear you breathing?

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Waynasite View Post
      We can hear you breathing?

      Where? Quality isnt the greatest I recorded this on my i phone haha at the end of the verse those two breaths you hear are from me cutting out the two other verses quality is super shitty but keep in my mind this is my first time recording




      #FREEVELVET

      Comment


      • #4
        too short friend

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Lucifer View Post
          too short friend
          defs can agree with that i got a 1:37 version but i want to re-record the second verse before i send it out just wanted to see how you guys liked the way it was going being my first project.




          #FREEVELVET

          Comment


          • #6
            It's not that bad actually, for your first recording session on the mic. You have a good voice, but you dont know how many words to use in a line - it doesnt flow very well. You are also kynda off beat but thats usual at the beginning. Definetly better than my first session though keep it up dude!

            ayyyyeee keep it real.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Mulafreak Jr. View Post
              It's not that bad actually, for your first recording session on the mic. You have a good voice, but you dont know how many words to use in a line - it doesnt flow very well. You are also kynda off beat but thats usual at the beginning. Definetly better than my first session though keep it up dude!

              thank you bro really appreciate that




              #FREEVELVET

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by vbnm151
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                → ★如果您在英、加、美、澳、欧洲等留学过程中或回国后遇到以下问题:
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                ◇企事业单位必须要求办理的
                ◇需要报考公务员、购买免税车、落转户口
                ◇申请留学生创业基金
                → ★广招代理为您做的是:
                ◆办理真实使馆公证(即留学回国人员证明,不成功不收费!!!) 
                ◆办理教育部国外学位学历认证。(网上可查、永久存档、快速稳妥,回国发展,考公务员,落户,进国企,外企,创业,无忧愁) 
                ◆办理各国各大学文凭(世界名校一对一专业服务,可全程监控跟踪进度)  
                ◆全套服务:毕业证、成绩、单真实使馆公证、真实教育部认证。让您回国发展信心十足!
                ◆可以提供钢印、水印、烫金、激光防伪、凹凸版、最新版的毕业证、百分之百让您绝对满意、设计,印刷;毕业证、成绩、单,真实大使馆教育部认证,速度快。
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                → ★广招代理向您保证:
                1:最优质的原版毕业证,成绩、单质量以及最新的版本!
                2:最专业耐心的客服咨询老师为您解答您的一切问题!
                3:与真实原版文件(毕业证书,成绩、单)使用同样制作材料,质地以及完善各项防伪技术!
                4:保证代办真实的使馆留学人员回国证明!
                5:保证代办真实的教育部海外学位学历认证!(我们如何向您保证?请联系网站客服会为您解答)
                6:国外大学原厂FRAME 保护好您的材料(所有Frame与原版学校相同供货渠道)
                7:在选择专业方面,做到最专业的咨询与建议(我们每个学期都会去各个大学拿最新的专业课程分析)
                8:定金+尾款模式,让您对我们更加信赖与放心!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by YMCMB357 View Post

                  Thoughts on verse?




                  #FREEVELVET

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Its not bad, but its cause its wayyy to short this was a 7 bar verse, i cant judge nothing off 7 bars

                    your first 5 bar scheme was good

                    stuck in a state of stagnation
                    im not patient can’t find my location
                    on google maps these rappers dieing out
                    no innovation dieing from realness deprivation
                    locked in they minds voluntary incarceration



                    But then ending with this couplet


                    they say imitation is the highest form of flattery
                    these rappers empty shells like dead batteries


                    kinda threw everything off you shouldve continued on into another long scheme


                    lyrically you are already up there using multis and then using adjectives and stuff, thats good


                    but the flow itself and delivery

                    remember, your voice is like an instrument that is just adding to the instrumental

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by KidComet View Post
                      Its not bad, but its cause its wayyy to short this was a 7 bar verse, i cant judge nothing off 7 bars

                      your first 5 bar scheme was good

                      stuck in a state of stagnation
                      im not patient can’t find my location
                      on google maps these rappers dieing out
                      no innovation dieing from realness deprivation
                      locked in they minds voluntary incarceration



                      But then ending with this couplet


                      they say imitation is the highest form of flattery
                      these rappers empty shells like dead batteries


                      kinda threw everything off you shouldve continued on into another long scheme


                      lyrically you are already up there using multis and then using adjectives and stuff, thats good


                      but the flow itself and delivery

                      remember, your voice is like an instrument that is just adding to the instrumental

                      Thank you bro really appreciate this can only get better from here i suppose haha




                      #FREEVELVET

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Lil_zimmie View Post

                        basically scrapped this up not sure if its any good i have two more verses recorded for it but i want to see how you guys like it as it stands now (first ever recorded song)

                        FEEDBACK:

                        http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...sic-video.html
                        http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...avid-slim.html
                        http://www.lilwaynehq.com/forums/tha...86-_-alex.html

                        LYRICS:

                        stuck in a state of stagnation
                        im not patient can’t find my location
                        on google maps these rappers dieing out
                        no innovation dieing from realness deprivation
                        locked in they minds voluntary incarceration
                        they say imitation is the highest form of flattery
                        these rappers empty shells like dead batteries
                        these rappers empty shells, load em up, bust salt to the slug......
                        [MENTION=85023]Lucifer[/MENTION], you read.. it was not complete so what's wrong with short? What i've learnt now days is people have very short attention spans, so you have to mash so much into a small duration for the attention to be kept... and that goes for you.

                        arrange it in a way that the use of your word's and you have to be very visual with them. along with the sound arrangement has to fit right. IT WILL PEAK SOMEONES INTERNESTED.....

                        Comment

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